in which i complain... as usual...
2004-01-26

Jeff says he can see where I have lost weight. Jeff says my butt and lower back look smaller. I think Jeff is full of shit. Although according to the scale last week I had lost 3.8 lbs., I still think this diet (ahem, I mean, Lifestyle Change) is crap. Maybe it’s just me, but I am always frickin hungry. We went to Golden Corral yesterday, which, to you non-southerners out there, is a large, chaotic, cheap, dirty, redneck’s dream of a buffet. My sister and her hubby love it… go figure. It is Steak and Shrimp Sunday so for 9 bucks you can go and eat all the steak and shrimp and other assorted and sundry foods they have about. Now I went because last week at Hate Watchers they said that the points were listed there, for each of their foods… I found out the hard way that they are not. So I did my best to eat well, with lots of veggies and small portions, but when I got home it still could have been anywhere from 14 to 18 points. Which sucks because after breakfast I had 20 points left. So dinner was Healthy Choice! I guess not all of you would understand the way it all works, but I have 30 points a day and I have to eat that much. If I go over I have to use “flexpoints’ and I have 35 of those per week. I like to save up the flex points so that I can splurge once a week. I hate to use them. I always feel bad about them for some reason. I think they are there cuz they know us fat chicks are gunna mess up. I think the problem is that they tell you that you can eat whatever you want, but if you eat what you want, you can’t have anything else that day. I want Taco Bell at ten am. Which makes for a hungry dog at 2 pm.

Fucking crazy if you ask me. I doubt if I will lose anything this week. I am just not feeling it for some reason. I didn’t drink my water at all yesterday. I can barely drink it today! I am tired of peeing.

So who’s tired of hearing about how much I hate weight watchers? Anybody amazed I am still going?

I meant besides me.

Yesterday was the weirdest day I have ever seen weather wise. Everything was frozen, but there was no snow. These are the days I miss CA the most.

I decided yesterday that I want a digital camera. I even checked them out at Sam’s Club and at Target, but the one I want is like 299 bucks. There is no budget for me to get a camera at those prices! I know I could get one a lot cheaper, but I wouldn’t be satisfied with one that was cheaper unless it offered all the neat shit this Olympus had. Plus it was pretty. I like pretty. I am still researching what most of the stuff means, like megapixels and digital zoom vs optical zoom, but what I want is one that is easy to use, and I picked up the Olympus and had it opened and was searching around the card at the pictures other people had taken with the display model… Now that’s uber cool, a camera I picked up and made work!! I can’t even do that with a film camera, well I can with my Elph, but the digital Elph is like 400 bucks. Last time I checked anyway. Hell I just want one that zooms.

Heh.

I actually have something poignant to say today I just haven’t discovered it. So I thought about it and thought about and I came to the realization that I am missing something in my life now. Something I had before, maybe not too long ago, but whatever it was it is gone now. Then when I was thinking of it and getting in the nerve to bitch about it, I realized what it was. I have nothing to bitch about. Nothing social I mean. There are tons of things socially that need to be bitched about. Things that require a public forum and the thoughts of a semi organized brain, but I can’t seem to get up the energy to do it. I want to talk about who I want to vote for, but I can’t decide who. I am having such a hard time that I will probably just vote for whomever Michael Moore votes for. But that is a total cop out! How can I let someone else decide for me? Besides how do I even know that the e-mail I received “from him” is actually written by him? Being a democrat and a semi liberal one at that I rely heavily on conspiracy theory. What if some nazi loving freak wrote that email trying to get to those of us who are too apathetic to decide for ourselves and put Moore’s name on it? What if Wesley Clark really is a republican?

Then again, I am not even sure I am registered to vote. I know I registered once, here in NC, then again in CA, but now that I am back in NC do I have to register again? Am I gunna get Jury Duty again if I do? I don’t want to do jury duty. I have a car payment for Chris’s sakes. You know , they wonder why our generation is so apt to not vote. I could tell you a thousand reasons and yet they would never change the requirements for voting. Maybe that is who I could vote for, someone who would make it so that I didn’t have to perform a civic duty in order to claim my basic civic rights.

Catch 22 man, catch 22.

I am going now.

Lunch beckons!

~ Black Eyed Dog

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